I love this idea! What are some ways you check in with your students?

What are your go to methods for building strong, trusting relationships with your students?

I just started in a new district and they do standards-based grading which I love because it gives students more time to practice and work towards mastery. I’m a math interventionist so I don’t give grades anymore but one of the things I did as a teacher was put a plus sign and then they number of points they got on an assignment. This way they knew what they got correct but they also felt better than just getting a bad score. We could then have more conversations about how they could continue to improve!

Today, I have been reflecting on my early years of teaching and a particular encounter that has stayed with me. During that time, I had a child who sat with me during recess due to behavior issues. He looked up at me and with a mischievous smile he said, “You’re scared of me, Ms. Erean.” I wasn’t scared of him at all; in fact, I found his comment intriguing. So, I asked him, “Why do you think I’m scared of you?”

With a smile he proclaimed: “I’m bad. I’m always bad. I got kicked out of my last school, and I’m going to be bad at this school too.” In that moment, my heart ached for him. It was clear he had been labeled and had internalized those negative messages about himself.
I realized that this child didn’t just need discipline; he needed understanding and support. I responded gently, “You know, everyone makes mistakes, and that doesn’t mean you’re bad. It just means you’re still learning.”

From that day on, I made it my mission to help him see his potential. We worked together to set small goals, focusing on positive behaviors rather than the negatives. I encouraged him to express his feelings and celebrated his successes, no matter how small. Slowly, he began to change, and so did my perspective.

His journey taught me a valuable lesson: the power of belief and support can transform a child’s self-image. As educators, we have the unique opportunity to redefine what a child believes about themselves. Instead of seeing a “bad” kid, I learned to see a child filled with potential, just waiting for someone to believe in him.

As the saying goes, “A child will burn down the village to feel the warmth among the ash.” This speaks to the lengths children may go to seek attention or affirmation.

What are some ways you’ve helped students reframe their self-perception and discover their strengths?