How do you manage difficult parents that seem to blame teachers for their child's behavior and absences?
My husband is the Assistant Principal at a local high school and we have the HS therapy dog, Hutch, that goes with him every day. One or two of the many things that he is in charge of is attendance and behavior. He loves to share the story about the time a parent came in and was irate about something that the school 'did' (rather than what their child was responsible for) and Hutch climbed up on the chair next to the parent and kept tilting his head from side to side every time the parent began to yell or scream! Eventually everyone in the room (including the parent) began to laugh... Hutch had diffused the tension in the room and afterwards they were all able to have a much more productive conversation. So - a school therapy dog can contribute in so many amazing ways to the learning environment and help with those difficult conversations with families!
Working with your school team as well. Chances are if there is trouble in your room it is see. In other rooms as well. Having other teachers also contact parents really helps take the pressure of of one person and helps parents understand not only the unity of the school but it’s not an isolated incident.
The most important tool in any teacher's tool kit is data. In this day and age of advanced technology tracking for schools, your LMS can provide some really important pieces of information such as time spent on assignments, grade means for an entire class, etc. Before meeting with a parent who may be a little sensitive, gather all of the data necessary to share the facts. And stick to those facts. You cannot allow yourself to get emotional in a meeting such as this. Remember that parents have the best interest of their child at heart. They don't always understand that you have the best interest of MULTIPLE children at heart. Many times a situation like this can be avoided if you have communicated both positive observations and items of concern WELL in advance. The more that parents hear from you (and I always document all conversations whether its email, Remind messages, or phone calls) the less likely they will be upset. Meeting with any parent that may be upset should also be done with a team of people to support you such as your administration and grade level team. Always provide support for yourself as you do for your parents of your students.
